ally and myself are back from basic training and AIT
april gets back in the end of november

i love the army ally hates it
i wanted to go active duty

i withdrew from iupui
i now go to the regency greenwood (cosmetology school)
i love it
people in my old class hate VC at iupui

i moved to greenwood
first time ever renting an apartment down here
its kinda sad moving away from ally

i bought a new car with my bonus
a 2000 yellow vw beetle
its a 5 speed
i love it
i dont stall anymore either.... that much

thats pretty much it for updates.

location: greenwood mood: cheerful music: bed by j holiday

if you want me to write you please include your first and last name and your address!!

mood: anxious

so does anyone know how to make like 500 bucks in just a week?
cause i kinda need that.
it sucks.
i hate being poor.

know what else sucks

waking up at 6 in the morning to have a PT class (with ROTC)
and having to be there by 645 and have class till 745
then stay at school to shower and get ready to be at VC classes by 9
then have class till 1130 with a little break
then start class back up at 1230 only to have class till 3.

mood: depressed music: puffy daddy "It's All about the Benjamins"

i had my first day of school yesterday...

man i forgot how tired and demanding it is!
i got home and took a nap.
it was wonderful.

but yes. i hope everyone else had a good break that was on break!
got everything nice for christmas!
i need to go shopping with my gift cards!!!
(victoria secret and american eagle)

im excited.
plus my biggest buy
a new camera!!
nikon coolpix S7c.
350. buckeroos!
all worth it though.
im in love with it!!

sigh. now i gotta get ready for my second day of school.
hope everyones doing good!

mood: awake music: incubus "dig"

im a pimp.

im not gonna lie.

i am.

mood: lonely music: anberlin "paperthin hymn"

my sister is out of the hospital and doing awesome :)
my grandma died on monday :(
been getting pretty tispy on wednesdays and thursdays in broadripple :)
but feel really crappy the next day :(
met really awesome guy named tim both nights :)
found out the guy i liked wasnt even from here :(
met up with old friends.. ryan! :)
... haha theres not bad thing about that....

but yes. just mostly hanging out with friends, living the life, going day to day.

so more in depth...
this has been a crazy semester.
just thats it. it has been at school. i cant believe this semesters almost over!

my sister is doing awesome.
out of the hospital just in time for thanksgiving!
it was soooo nice to be able to have her home!
and i took care of her for the following 6 days that i was there :)

allys grandma died, saras grandma died, nikkis grandma died, and my grandma died.
all in one sememester!
CALL YOUR GRANDMAS AND TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM!
kinda sad :(

yeah..
and so met this guy tim 2 weeks ago at the vouge and it was really weird cause in the beining of the night the girls and i were like kaitlin thats the guy you need to be with, and i was like yes. i know. and so what happens.... after TONS of drinks... i become one of those sluts that make out on the dance floor. geesh. it was crazy. and then it just happened all over again the next night at landsharks! :) it was a good 2 days.. but then come to find out that he just moved away from indy to go to Penn. who moves there?!?!?! seriously! (ive been saying seriously a lot, im blaming greys anatomy)

and...
ryan. oh ryan. geesh
that kid i tell ya.
whoever he ends up marrying is the luckiest girl ever.
hes the best guy you could ever find.
funny, nice, sweet, cute...
the perfect combo, you dont find that much.
yeah.
ive been waiting for that kiss for a year and a half,
and i finally got it last night :)
im the happiest camper ever....
cloud nine for me today :)

location: cloud9 mood: cheerful music: family force 5 "luv addict"

i hope everyone is going to have a safe halloween!!!

everyone should also check out the new nightmare before christmas theme song that marilyn manson did. its fantastic!

mood: bouncy

so im guessing none of you know.. but my sister had heart surgery to fix the marfans syndrome (it deals with your arteries in your heart and my mom died from this) and so she was doing alright.. but then there was some complications. and so on my way driving to cleveland i got a call from her husband saying that something wasnt right and that she needed to have surgery again.
so this means that they inserted a balloon to help it. but they need to keep her chest open and her heart exposed and monday they will take the balloon out and close her up.
now seeing her like this is killing me
like i want to trade places with her...
and its making me soooo proud cause shes being soooo strong.

all i can think of is my big wimpy sister is kickin this things ass and showin it whos boss. i love it!

so i just felt like i needed to tell someone. something about this.

mood: gloomy

my friend sarah morris is really smart.

this is an actual converstion she had:


and this is why i love sarah morris.

location: hooome mood: groggy music: goldfrapp "strict machine"

the other day was my friends bday....

so as im driving to the vouge.. thinking that my friends left me and went there..

i get 2 flat tires


i hit a curb... speeding...

dont do that.

ohhhh yes! and ps. i dont have my cell phone!

so then i run about a little less than a mile to the vouge...
only to find out that they arent there.

i call my friends (on a random persons cell)
one says shes too far away (brownsburg *later come to find out she would have came to get me)
then she calls another friend and she lives in broadripple, she says shes already in bed


so then as im in a cab waiting to leave...
there they are.

the next day i go to the tire store...
I WAIT FUCKING 6 HOURS!
for my car to get towed to this place

then just about all my windows are broke.. and they fucking roll down my drivers side..
which you can roll down... but cant roll up.

so i had to deal with that then.

i wanted to kill someone by the time i left.

mood: bitchy music: a change of pace

i had some very memorable quotes from my last class...
and i have the need to share them with you

((by the way some of these are from a movie and some are from my teacher. you decided who said what))

"these people arent just poor, they have shit!!"

"its like 10 burritos in there((your stomach)), going to town!"
"i came here to chew bubble gum, and to kick ass"

"lifes a bitch, and shes in heat"

"look you crazy mutha!"

"what some guy throws eggs at arnold swartz and he says 'that guy owes me bacon!'"

"critical thinkers arent just these mean guys who are like ((macho voice))'uuughh i hate the mona lisa, pacaso sucks!'"

"i can tell you my favorite color is read and your like 'no no no no no. its silver.'"

location: in a white room mood: artistic music: lostprophets

so i got something else pierced

just cause at drill evvveryone was talking about getting tattooed or pierced soo i just had the itch to get one again

and i thought hmmm
what would be a good piercing?




since im going to the lostprophets show...
why not be like jamie...

location: wonderland mood: sore music: lostprophets

yes.

it seriously hurts to live,
such as
breathe in and out, sit down, sit up, move my legs in a walking motion, move up and down stairs...


why do you ask does it hurt to live?

damn it.
it kicked mine... and not only mine but also my trusty battlebuddy aprils ass.
it hurts us to live.

oh yes. and as i just found out
it hurts to sneeze too.

location: in a state of pain mood: sore music: jane's addiction "jane says"

boo. thats early


at least april my handy dandy sidekick will be there with me
we see eachother naked when we shower.
haha

ugh... PT for 1 hour... running, pushups, situps...

location: dream land mood: tired music: in the army now

here i go again

talking about how much i hate guys..
but maybe its not how much i hate guys
maybe im just saying i hate guys...
but i really hate myself
i hate myself for putting myself in this situation.
letting myself get hurt
letting myself get too attached
letting myself get walked on.

so i wrote him*josh* an email
and sure i didnt want to
i really didnt want to
but the best got ahold of me and i did
like something just takes control of me
and i feel like i HAVE to write him
because maybe,
just maybe that one email will get though to him.


and so he read it...

and so i get anything back
no.
of course not.

fucking guys.
lately i really just wanna cry.
cause i know what im doing isnt healthy
im not going to find a boyfriend this way
im just lowering myself to please guys
its sad.

and the past couple guys
sure i really wanted it to work.
i would have gone far and wide to make it work
but i just feel like i give and give
and i get nothing in return
im too caring and im too trustworthy
i believe in the other person too much
and i get screwed.
i just feel like a worthless piece of crap
not even human.
i'm a piece of crap.

mood: crushed

why do they do this to us??

all i want is for him to call me.


oh yes.
and so ive come to the conclusion that im not girlfriend material.
i dont know...
i can get guys and all...
but i cant get them to want to call me their girlfriend.
i guess im just a good lay.

location: computer lab mood: sad music: pink floyd "wish you were here"